The Cheese
Teleme (TELL ah may), or more precisely Tamales Bay Teleme by the Peluso family, is a cheese dating back to the early part of the 20th century. It was around this time that the Peluso family immigrated to Northern California from Crete. Homesick for their native cheeses, the family modified a recipe for a Cretan goat’s milk cheese called Touloumi to accommodate the abundant cow’s milk available in America. The resulting cheese is an American original and worth searching out. It comes in two packaging options, the more modern cry-o-vac pouch that looks like rindless Brie, and the original rice flour coating. If available, always go for the rice flour version, but the bag version is quite acceptable.

This cheese is like the creamiest fresh Monterey Jack or Double Crème Havarti blended with classic brie. It has a rich, mouth-coating texture and a tart finish that is subtle when young and pronounced when aged. Not nearly as complex as a Brie de Meaux or a Vacherin Mont d’Or, but with a nutty-brothy-peaty flavor unlike any other cheese I can call to mind.

The most important thing with Teleme is the brand; it MUST BE Peluso’s Tamales Bay Teleme or it is not the real thing. The cheese is no longer produced in Tamales Bay, nor even in California for that matter. But the same family still owns the company and still takes great pride in producing a true American original cheese, as evidenced by the awards they continue to accumulate, including a Best of Show from the American Cheese Society.

The Beer
The Germans are among the world’s best brewers, and within Germany there are numerous distinct styles of beer. Some are seasonal like Marzen (March beer) and Maibock  (May Bock beer); others are regional like Dortmunder Export and today’s subject, Kölsch.

While most of the beer styles in Germany and the surrounding Central European countries of Austria, the Czech Republic and Slovakia are lager-style beers, there are a few holdouts from the days before lagers, when all beer was ale. Among them, Kölsch and Altbier (Old Beer) are the most common.

The German name for the city we refer to as Cologne is Köln, so beer from there is called Kölsch. The city has one of the oldest brewers’ guilds in the world, dating back to 1254. They are serious about their beer, with about twenty breweries in and around Cologne, all making Kölsch. They have zealously guarded their beer traditions against all invaders, particularly against their biggest rival, the ubiquitous pale lager, Pilsner.

While Kölsch may look like a Pilsner, don’t be fooled. These beers are not big and complex like a Belgian Tripel, nor fruity as an English Pale Ale. Neither are they bracingly hoppy as a Pilsner is wont to be. They are simple, crisp, clean beers showing more malt character than any lager, and particularly a Pilsner. They have restrained carbonation and show a slight sweetness in the palate, with a nice acidity coming on in the finish. This may be the perfect warm weather beer. Not many makers of this fun little beer ship to the U.S., but look for Reissdorf or Küppers. The Pyramid Brewing Company also makes a version of this beer, and while not a bad beer, it is not Kölsch.

The Extras
This is a simple pairing, best enjoyed with simple sides. I like pears and apples as my fruit and smoked Black Forest salami as my meat. This pair would work with almost any bread, but I like sleazy old Wheat Thins. Taken as a whole, this collection of flavors reminds me of sitting with my grandfather on a dock in Florida, fishing for nothing, and enjoying crackers, salami and cheese. He always had Lederkranz (a soft, creamy, stinky cheese not available any longer), and he loved Kölsch beer.

Why it Works
These are uncomplicated flavors and they marry simply on your palate. The creaminess of the Teleme is balanced by the light, crisp acidity in the Kölsch, while the smokiness in the salami brings an earthy note to the tune. The crackers bring out a nuttiness in the cheese not noticeable without the wheat component. Enjoying this pair is not an Earth-shaking experience, nor is it intended to be. It’s just a very pleasant way to spend a warm afternoon on the dock, or in the park, or just about anywhere. 

Created for Barbara Admas Beyond Wonderful
by Cheese Expert, Mark "The Cheese Dude" Todd.

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